Everywhere that I have been the past two weeks, it has been very clear to see the devastation that the war resulted in. It is easy to see in the land around me and even in the attitude of the people as a whole. However, the war’s effects are hard to see in the hearts of the individual people unless you are blessed by getting to talk to them about it one on one. I was blessed in that exact way this morning.
Janet is the name of the girl who cooks lunch for the kids and the whole Zion staff every day. She lived in the Zion Project’s original rescue home for child mothers until she graduated the system and got certified in catering. She is 19 years old and was abducted by the LRA from her village here in Gulu when she was 13. She was a child soldier and forced to be a “wife” to one of the LRA officers, until she became pregnant. They started paying less attention to her then, because she couldn’t keep up with the rest of the LRA’s army of children in their raids. One day, she left the camp to go find water and just decided to keep on walking. Janet said that she knew if she was caught that she would be killed, but at that point she didn’t care. She was helped by some officer of the official Ugandan military and eventually made her way back to Gulu and gave birth to a son.
Throughout this whole conversation I wasn’t sure what questions were appropriate to ask (y’all know I like to ask people questions), so after she told me her story all I asked was how she was able to recover after. “Praying,” was all she said. I asked her what some of her prayers were back then and she told me that whenever she wasn’t seeking the Lord through prayer she became overwhelmed with feelings of guilt and shame and disgust at the things that she had done, even if it was against her will. So she decided to find a way that would make her be able to be praying every moment of every day. Janet told me that with every breath she takes, she says a prayer. In the beginning her prayer was this: “Jesus Christ, Son of God (while inhaling), forgive me, a broken sinner (while exhaling).” She said she knew she had to be disciplined about it or the darkness of her past would consume her mind. Now Janet prays about whatever God puts on her heart that day, because she feels completely healed of the wounds that the war inflicted upon her heart.
Imagine how much more this earth would come to resemble the kingdom of heaven if every follower of Jesus prayed with every breath that they took. My conversation with Janet challenged me and today I am going to start training myself to allow prayer to become as constant as breathing. I’m going to start out praying Psalm 16:1…I’ll be sure to let y’all know how it goes! I miss you all and cannot say thank you enough for any of your prayers, I feel covered in them!
“Obsess over you sin and you’ll become a neurotic narcissist. Obsess over your Savior and you will be freed from all chains.”
“Satan isn’t troubled when we go to church, but his knobby knees tremble when we pray boldly.”
